I totally lost it earlier this week. I blame most of it on stress at work and a little bit on pregnancy hormones.
It all started when I fell out of bed in the morning. We have a pretty tall bed and my belly is getting big. My daughter had crawled into bed with us an hour or so before so I was trying to sneak out and in all my pregnant glory didn’t get my feet underneath me and hit my hand (and head) on the night stand. After that I decided I probably just should get up. I started my workout and I am not really sure what triggered it, but I started crying. I think it was some combination of falling and having to pause my workout to let the dogs back inside, which turned into a mini project because their paws were muddy.
I cried while getting ready that morning and on the way to work. I almost held it together at work and was able to hide it from almost everyone all day. Unfortunately, I forgot my Shakeology at home so I ended up sneaking out to grab Subway. I cried in the car before finally getting it together enough to go inside. After hours of frustrating phone calls and a pretty big (and successful) meeting I lost it again in the car ride to pick up my daughter.
I feel like so often I preach about staying strong and moving forward, but on that day I felt like a hypocrite. How was I supposed to encourage others when I couldn’t keep it together myself? I did end up giving myself a little bit of a break that day. I got up the next morning and went through my same routine. My workout went better; the whole morning went better. Even though the workday was still pretty stressful I made it through the day just fine.
I thought that being strong meant being able to keep it together, maybe not all the time, but definitely most of the time. I’ve had bad moments before and even some rough days, but I had always been able to shake them off. This time it was different, but I think the most important thing I took away is that I didn’t stay there. I continue to surround myself with people that encourage and motivate others because even the strongest of us need some extra help sometimes.