I must have missed the memo that declared life is fair. Someone will always have it better than you and someone will always have it worse than you. There will always be someone that works harder than you and someone that doesn’t work as hard. This isn’t a man vs women battle, its life.
In just a few days I’ve been told I am unequal to a man and I need to stand up for myself by protesting, later told I am not a second class citizen and should appreciate the opportunities I do have, only to be told the next day that I am not equal. I am sure tomorrow someone will come back and say “No I’m not oppressed”
One minute I am reading about how women feel oppressed, and the same day I am listening to a male coworker concerned he has a concussion because his baby’s mom has hit him so many times. All while putting roof over her head, paying her bills, too scared to kick her out because he knows she can take off with his kid and he’ll be lucky to see him every other weekend. This isn’t the first or second time I’ve heard this story.
Maybe you feel like this is a different situation, but aren’t you also arguing for equality? Maybe the right answer is to treat women equal to men, but only in situations that are advantageous to them.
I also looked up the statistics on domestic violence to see if maybe these were isolated incidents. I found that the Centers for Disease Control discovered that 40% of victims of severe domestic violence were men. Another study I found also suggests that women are MORE likely to be controlling and physically aggressive. So I hear you when you say women are still being beaten by their significant other, but I hate to break it to you; men are too. Again we don’t have an oppression issue; it appears we have a lack of understanding on what a healthy functioningrelationship looks like.
Another thing that frustrates me is the wage gap claim. Don’t make as much as the man working next to you? When is the last time you demanded a raise? I can almost guarantee it as recently as your male counterpart. As women we tend to settle, it’s a sad fact of life. Instead of accepting it (or protesting) have that discussion with your employer. Don’t like the answer, then find a new job. If finding a new job is too painful then you’re not really unsatisfied.
On the same note during the few years I was hired into my position in a male dominated field I learned that there were two equally qualified candidates and they chose the women over the man. That puts a bit of a damper on the whole oppression thing doesn’t it? At one point in my career I was told that I should use being in a male dominated field to my advantage because companies were looking to change the optics of the situation. So basically I’ll be chosen over a male, who may be slightly more qualified than me because I am a female and they are working towards a quota. That can’t be right, since women are oppressed. I also have been in a situation multiple times where I was not paid as much as my counterpart. I was encouraged at one point to play the “it’s because I’m a women card” but I couldn’t do it. In hindsight, shame on me for not standing up for myself and demanding I get paid for the job I was doing regardless of being a female.
Let’s also not forget the fact that men and women are not biologically or physically equal. I don’t feel like this needs to be explained any further. Read a book if you need to understand the chemistry behind it.
Let’s also stop and take some accountability for our actions. If you don’t like the way boys are treating women, then sorry mom’s but it’s your fault for not teaching them the difference between what is appropriate and what isn’t. For those women putting up with it, stop. I know, way easier said than done. People do it every day though. I would bet that the population of people (YES people, not women) that have been in abusive relationships at one point in their lives is next to none.
I do appreciate women over the past several years that have stood up for women’s rights and have gotten us to where we are today. I don’t think we’ll ever be “equal” to men and I am not sure that I want to be. I wanted to be treated as the individual I am.
